You know something is seriously wrong when you go to get up off the sofa and are out of breath in the process.
For a while now I have struggled with my breathing. Whether it’s walking or even just going up the stairs I lack breath. This makes exercising really difficult and losing those extra pounds twice as hard. 

I came across the powerbreath when researching tools that could help you to breath when exercising. The powerbreath is an Inspiratory muscle training device and has been proven to help people breath more easily within 4 weeks. You use the device twice daily and take in 30 breaths each time. There are a certain number of restriction settings depending on which device you buy; so if like me you need to start with a easy exercise you set the powerbreath to the lowest setting and work your way up as you improve.

Today is my first go with the powerbreath so let’s see if this little device can get me breathing more clearly in 4 weeks.

B x

Bucket list!

Recently I’ve been thinking what do I want from life. What do I hope to achieve or do. Life is so short that we should cherish every single second we have this planet.

Here is the top 50 things in life I want to achieve , see or do-

1.       Own a Raven

2.       Learn woodcrafts

3.       Get a medal in Longbow archery

4.       Do a jousting experience day

5.       Buy my own house and land

6.       Join a Viking re-enactment group

7.       Go to the Eden project

8.       Horse ride western style 

9.       Take part in a race for charity

10.   Re-Trace my family tree

11.   Go to as many Pagan events as possible

12.   Reach my target weight of 9 stone

13.   Celebrate Halloween in America

14.   Learn to use my sewing machine

15.   See as many historical places of interest as possible

16.   Climb to the top of Snowdon

17.   Have a baby

18.   Do a sloth experience 

19.   Climb a mountain in Norway

20.   Do a raven experience 

21.   Go glamping at Warwick castle

22.   Do a wolf experience 

23.   Go to Stonehenge

24.  Learn leatherwork 

25.   See Elizabeth I tomb in Westminster Abbey

26.   Go in a hot air balloon

27.   Go to a masquerade ball

28.   Go to Edinburgh

29.   Get married and have a big outdoor pagan bash (maybe by the time I reach 30)

30.   Ride in a helicopter

31.   Open my own New age/book shop

32.   See the Freddie Mercury statue in Montreux, Switzerland

33.   See the Lion King show in London – Saturday 15th April 2017

34.   Stay the night in Chillingham Castle

35.   Run naked and make love in the wilderness

36.   Buy a Saarloos Wolfdog puppy

37.   Get a Raven tattoo

38.   Stop in a glass igloo in Finland

39.   Visit Glastonbury town

40.   See Pink in concert

41.  Visit Istanbul

42.  Drive a vintage mustang

43.   Sleep in a treehouse with nature

44.   Meet Dawn French

45.   See the Book of Mormon in London 

46.  Visit Bali or Thailand

47.   Create my own pagan moot/retreat 

48.   Go to a festival (into the wild maybe)

49.   Enter something handmade into a county show

50.   Learn Yoga

There is so much more I could add to this list. Life is about seizing the day and having no regrets. We make our own paths in life it’s our choice if we decided to actually take them or not. Live life whilst you’re here because there certainly is no replay button. Come on this journey with me and let’s see what we discover.

B x

9 months contraception free!


9 months ago I quit all hormonal birth control. At the time I was on the Depo-Provera contraception injection but after so many disadvantages I decided to bite the bullet and walk away from all things hormonally synthetic.

So 9 months on how am I feeling, not great to be honest there are up’s and down’s. Here are my top 5 things I have noticed 5 months on.

  1. Periods – My periods finally returned, it took 5 months but at the end of September I finally had my first period in years. The good thing is that they have pretty much gone back to a regular 28 day cycle and at the moment are extremely light and lasting only 4 days which I like a lot.
  2. Weight – I gained nearly 5 stone over the past 18 months, strangely most of my weight I gained towards the end of been on the injection and coming off the injection. I thought I would of seen a slight decrease in weight once stopping the injection but honestly I am finding it so hard to lose the weight at the moment.
  3. PMS – One thing I have noticed which is a real disadvantage is PMS. Every month a few days before I come on I have noticed I become extremely down and anxious. I become teary, not to mention the headaches, bloat and extreme food cravings which I have to try and keep under control. My first period I had back in September I never had the PMS but slowly I have noticed more and more each month I am becoming worse with it which is worrying.
  4. Skin – My skin has improved so much now I am off the Depo. Whilst I was on the injection I found my skin very all over the place and I would suffer breakouts on my face. Now my skin is so clear. I have the occasional spot and at the moment my face is dry but that is due to it been winter but I love how my skin feels at the moment.
  5. Sex drive – I have to say my sex drive has increased rapidly coming off the injection. When I was on contraception my sex drive really lacked and I had no interest what so ever in sex. Now I am free of contraception I feel I have this wild side that I never knew I had before, my libido has increased so much. The only thing that is making my sex life suffer is vaginal dryness, this is the only issue sex wise in which I have had since going on the injection.

Over all I am really glad I made the decision to come off all hormonal birth control. There are still a few health issues in which I am trying to get answers for at the moment; I personally feel the Depo-Provera was responsible for these problems but until then I am going to carry on with my health journey to the best I can. Have you decided to quit birth control, how is your journey contraceptive free, do you feel the right decision was made?

B x

Clubbercise! Whats the fuss all about?

Clubbercise; glow sticks, loud club music and a school assembly hall full of sweaty bodies in close proximity. What is the vibe for the new craze that is clubbercise?

There is no hiding the fact that I could do with a little bit of exercise here and there. When my Sister in law suggested going to clubbercise with her I was a bit dubious of the idea; club music isn’t really my cup of tea at the best of times, it’s something in which I really have to be in the mood for; alongside the fact I have as much rhythm as a cactus, what could possibly go wrong!

The dreaded evening arrived, I hadn’t planned at all so rushed home from work to dig out some gym gear I had tucked away at the back of my wardrobe somewhere. Size 10, Shit! Luckily for me most gym clothes are super stretchy so I just about managed to squeeze my size 16-18 self into these tiny leggings and top.

My local clubbercise is held at the local high school. I think many are held in similar venues, the classes are becoming so popular now that most areas have a class going somewhere and sometime during the week so relatively easy to find a class near you if you are interesting in joining. The lady who runs my local class has a Facebook page in which you have to register your place on the night beforehand. Due to the high amount of interest in which they get they are only allowed to limit so many places so work on a first come first in basis.

Signing up is really simple. Simply register online before you go, book your place and turn up on the evening. There is one leaflet to fill out with general details, you pay your £5 entry and £3 for your reusable battery operated glow sticks and away you go.

I must admit getting into clubbercise after the first session was really difficult for me. Not only am I extremely unfit at the moment and had to rush out half way through breathless and unfortunately having a case of joggers belly from all the movement I just couldn’t keep up. The lady taking your class is on a stage in front of you and you have to basically follow her routine. I found that most of the time I was trying to concentrate to much on what the hell she was doing that I couldn’t get to grips with it myself. If I was an onlooker watching me dance I would say I probably looked like a goldfish that had jumped out the water onto dry land.

That said it was my first ever session so forgive myself a little for not getting it straight away. Overall I did have a good laugh and boy it got me sweating and aching that’s for sure.

I have already booked in for next week so fingers crossed I will be able to keep up a bit better then. Little bit early to comment if I think clubbercise works in terms of weight loss, that one will have to be a work in progress for now.

B x


The Real Me!

fontover_20171247820628.jpgFor hours I have been asking myself whether I should do this or not. Lay bare myself for everyone to see. When it comes to my body and how I look I am not the most confident in the world. I get nervous sometimes been around my own boyfriend with hardly anything on let alone you lot seeing what I have become; that’s how unhappy I am with my body at this moment in time.

However; for me to do this journey and share this journey with everyone I thought it is important for you to see the real me. The me right now and the me that has to change.


Not so long ago I was a healthy size 8-10. I loved the outdoors and fitness; I was such a confident person. Over the past 18 months I have rapidly gained 5 stone, now wearing a size 16-18. I am not sure what this is down to, my eating habits have not changed and I am not overly stressed, maybe its something to do with the Depo contraception injection, who knows.

All I know now is that it is time for change. I want to lose this horrible over hang belly I have gained; even be able to get my face back, I seriously do not recognise myself anymore when I look in the it’s awful, the person staring back at me isn’t me. 

I know this journey is going to be a really tough one. Probably will be one of the hardest things in my life I will have to do, there is going to be pain and disappointment at times but I want to do this, I need to this, even if its just 1lb at a time.

B x





Organic Sanitary Company

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A few months ago, I discovered and amazing company TOTM that make organic sanitary products, ever since I have not looked back.

For years before going on contraception I use to have the worst possible periods a girl could ask for. They were unbearable. I was always so heavy that tampons were something I never even dreamt about using so always stuck to the longest thickest pads the supermarket had to offer. There was also another little problem; itching!

During that time of the month I would itch like crazy, my thighs also use to get rashes and it was a nightmare to go anywhere. Back then I never imagined for one second it was down to my sanitary products. Once going on contraception my periods vanished and I went around 3 years not actually having a period up until recently when I made the decision that I actually missed my periods.

When Aunt Flo visited me for the first time in 3 years I straight away went back to the supermarket brands. Always, Bodyform even supermarket own brand pads, you name it I tried it; but still I was feeling so uncomfortable from having a constant itch I couldn’t bare it much longer.

I came across an advert on social media that showed two tampons in a glass of water. The first was a supermarket branded tampon and the other a TOTM tampon. It shocked me to see how the supermarket brand seemed to disintegrate slowly in the water, letting of bits of god knows what. The TOTM tampon on the other hand stayed intact the whole time. That is when it got me thinking about what am I actually using and is this the reason why I am having itching and rashes during that time of the month.

I headed straight to the TOTM website. Greeted by fresh images and easy to read information on the brand I decided that’s when I needed to make a change and go Organic.

I started my periods when I was 11 years old, so after many years of using cheap sanitary products it never once occurred to me to look at the ingredients of the products. Yes, that’s right; the ingredients. Sanitary product companies such as Always and Bodyform do not have to state on the packaging what ingredients they use in order to make a tampon or sanitary towel. So like most things how healthy were these products to actually use.

TOTM use 100% pure certified organic cotton, they do not use chlorine dioxide to bleach their products, no chemicals such as pesticides, chemical fertilisers, perfumes or dyes are used in their products and most of all they are hypoallergenic so even the most sensitive of people can use these amazing sanitary items.

I’ve been using these pads for around 6 months now; at first I was a bit weary of trying something new but 6 months on I am so glad I made the change. I have never worn something more comfortable, they are so comfortable and soft you almost forget it’s there. Also, my itch has completely gone. No more do I get the urge to scratch and no rashes are to be seen anywhere.

As my period is starting to come back a little more on the heavy side I use the night time pads throughout the day just for that little more protection against any leakages. The pads are amazing for the amount of blood they hold. I use around 3 pads a day and as they are made from cotton they are just like having underwear on.

110% I would recommend this company to every woman out there. We spend so much time into trying to look after our bodies, doesn’t our period deserve the same kind of treatment.

Go check out Time of the month at  http://www.totm.com

B x


Beginning of my weight loss journey!


Weight gain! The endless slog of dieting and tedious trips to the gym starring at the four walls and the buff bodies around you whilst you struggle to even last ten minutes on the treadmill, making you feel even worse about yourself.

My weight hasn’t always been a struggle; a couple of years ago, I was slim, healthy and always wanting to work out and be outdoors doing an activity of some sort. It has only been recently that even walking up the stairs can be a struggle and saying no when someone offers me that cake at work, that has where my downfall has been. I started to notice my weight creeping up on me when I was mid-way through having the Depo Provera contraception injection. I had been on the pill beforehand for many years, my weight increased slightly but not as much as it did when I went on the dreaded injection.

9 months ago, I decided to quit all hormonal birth control. It was a decision that was very easy for me, I wanted to become healthier and fit again. The only problem is 9 months on I am still not any slimmer and those stairs are more of a struggle now than ever before. I never thought I would get to a point in my life where just doing normal everyday things would have me out of breath and in agony.

I decided now is the time to change, I do not want to hit 30 and have health issues that I really should not be having at my age due to my weight. I jumped on the scales and 13st 7lbs is the damage; 5 stone heavier then what I was 2 years ago, I have crept up from a size 8-10 to a size 16-18.

So, what am I going to do about it?

For me I am really bad at sticking to diets and the gym, I find them so gruelling and hard to stick to that I give up before I have even begun. Here is what I am going to do my way to lose the weight I want.

  1. I am aiming to lose 4-5st within the next year. I do not want to lose weight quickly as this can be unhealthy for you so I am to lose 1-2lb a week.
  2. I am going to learn to say no more to myself. I need more willpower so I do not cave in every time someone brings cake or junk food into the office. Just because they eat it doesn’t mean I have to. Sometimes I eat just because it’s there and not because I actually want to.
  3. Get more active. This is something in which I have lacked the past few years. I am going to get out there, move around more and get fitter. The gym isn’t for me so going to give vigorous walking a go along with some home workout routines.
  4. Eat small but regular. My plan is to not eat three big meals a day but to break down my food to regular intervals throughout the day. That way I am eating small portion sizes but also eating regular will not make me feel as hungry or crave foods I shouldn’t be eating.
  5. Fasting. I have decided I am going to give fasting a go but do it my way. I am going to eat small and regular throughout the day but fast after 4pm four nights of the week. The weekends I am going to be a bit more lenient.

I hope you will follow me on this weight loss journey. Are there any of you reading this that are also going through your own weight loss journey? What tips would you give that have worked for you to make you become more fit and healthy?

B x