Bucket list update. The Lion King!

After many years of waiting I finally got to tick one thing from my bucket list and went to see The Lion King at London’s Lyceum theatre.


I was not left disappointed, The Lion King is a show full of colour and song and throughout it really brought back my childhood memories of watching one of my favourite Disney films. From start to finish there has been a lot of thought put into detail, I was impressed with the masks in which the actors wear making them been able to cover their faces mechanically when they need to for more dramatic scenes. The wildebeest scene is also very impressive, it also managed to bring a tear to my eye when Mufasa falls from the cliff face.


Overall I would rate the Lion King 4 out of 5. The costumes and set are very impressive but at times I thought that it was a bit to pantomime. I love the Lion King show within the Animal Kingdom park in Florida so my expectations were kind of up there with that a bit, if I had to pick between the two I would say the show in Animal Kingdom does top the London show unfortunately, however I would definitely recommend the London show. Also the merchandise they had on offer was to die for, they had such sweet cuddly toys and items to choose from for a lasting memory to take home.


One ticked off my bucket list, forty nine to go!


B x


2017 life plan!

I am stuck. Stuck in a dead end in which I cannot for the life of me seem to get out of. Every day I wake with this notion of change and making changes within my life in order to make me happy; it never happens. Instead I go through each day just as miserable as the one before it and not motivated enough or maybe even brave enough to go out and make the changes in which I need in order to be where I want to be within life.


There are aspects in my life in which I am so happy with; my love life for example, finally I have found someone who I adore and love more than love itself if that makes sense. He still fills me with butterflies every time I see him, yes we have our off days and we argue but who doesn’t, I wouldn’t trade him in for all the riches in the world he means that much to me.  I also have the most amazing family in which a person could ask for; my parents support me and still stick by me even though I am 26 years old they are always there for me when I need them. Growing up you always take your parents for granted and never really understand why they moan and groan at you all the time with their words of wisdom but as you get older and experience how hard life truly is you look back on those words and actually think they were right the whole time and how you wish you had listened to them and appreciated them a little bit sooner.


If I am honest ten years ago I thought life would be totally different to what it actually is now, my life plan hasn’t exactly headed in the direction in which I hoped. I had this vision of marriage and my own home by the time I was 30. Growing up I always wanted to work for myself and have a business doing something in which I loved, that hasn’t mapped out the way I would of liked. Instead of having my own business I am stuck working in a job in which I detest. Getting up each morning doing the same mundane commute to sit in the same chair in the same office doing mundane tasks for mundane people isn’t exactly my idea of an awarding career. When you have to literally drag yourself out of bed each morning with no motivation and go home at the end of each day depressed then you know there is something not quite right.


I think that my life has become so out of control over the past two years and I have become so stuck in my ways of mundane routine this has also had an effect on my overall general health. Sitting down for eight hours a day isn’t the best for your figure, you tend to binge on any food going because it is the only exciting thing of the day in which you have experienced. Yep slowly but surely alongside help from hormonal birth control 5 stone has crept its way onto my waistline. Been lazy at work also has the tendency to make you lazy after work. You become so bored and exhausted with been bored all day long the last thing you want to do when you get home is exercise. Your life turns into one never ending mundane lazy vicious circle in which you are stuck in and cannot escape.


So I have decided I need an action plan. Something to focus on throughout the rest of 2017 and what I want to achieve ready for 2018. I need that motivation to push myself further and actually get what I want out of life so here it goes, my goals for the rest of 2017 are:

1. Get a new job, yes it is not my own business just yet but I really need change from what I am doing now. I need to focus on getting something I will at least enjoy however to get me by until I get my own business within the future.

2. Lose weight, something in which I keep saying over and over but never seem to do. My target is to lose at least 2 stone by the end of this year.

3. Gain knowledge, whether this be through volunteering or just reading, I need to apply myself and get out there more to experience things in which could help me within the future.

4. Enjoy life! I know this sounds like a funny one but having fun and not worrying is a big one for me. I need to take a step back sometimes and not be so anxious and panicky when it comes to life in general. I need to start living not threating.


Life is one big challenge in which we all face. There are times in our lives where we aren’t always where we want to be but it is down to us to do something about it. Change is something in which is possible if we just go out and search for it. Change will not come to you and this is something in which I am slowly learning. Life is an endless journey of possibilities and if we seize every moment and take hold of every opportunity then life can be an amazing one. I am not going to let myself down anymore, this is my time to seize that moment and take life by the horns.


B x

500 Mile Walking Challenge!

This year my plan was to become a lot fitter and a lot healthier. After gaining a lot of weight over the past two years due to lifestyle changes and the contraceptive injection I gradually also became very unfit and very unhealthy. I have tried various diets to lose weight, slimming world and weight watchers but nothing seemed to help; the doctor even put me on Orlistat tablets to see if it was my diet that was the actual cause of my weight gain. Instead of losing weight on the tablets like you should I actually gained another 6lbs whilst been on them. After various health checks it has recently came to the doctors attention that there is a problem with my liver in which I am currently having investigated to try and get to the root cause of the problem. In the mean time I thought what better way to get fit and get healthier whilst also seeing the beautiful British countryside so I instantly signed up for the 500 mile challenge.


The 500 mile challenge is something I came across in the April issue of country walking magazine. I have never read this magazine before but for some reason was drawn to it in the local supermarket whilst doing the weekly shop. Walking and hiking is something in which I have always wanted to get into but never really got round to doing. After flicking through the first couple of pages of the magazine I came across the challenge, I read through the information of what it is all about and a story of a lady who completed the challenge last year and how it had a huge impact on her life; after losing 4 stone and dropping 3 dress sizes she stated that she never felt better in life and has become so much healthier within herself. Instantly I thought I could do that, I know it is going to be a gradual process and that walking long distance at first is not going to be easy but I am feeling so positive about this challenge. I also feel that having the challenge and the 500 miles to aim for will make my transition towards a healthier lifestyle so much more easier, having something to focus on and achieve at the end of it will make it so worth it.


Not only do I want to aim to walking 500 mile this year, I am to lose at least 2 stone in weight and finally get my health issues under control once and for all. This is to a new me and a new way of life. If you are interested yourself in joining the 500 mile challenge you can find information on how to do so in the country walking magazine. Not only will you get fit and healthy through walking but if you download a printable mile tracker from their website using the unique code from the magazine you will be entered in regular competitions to win some awesome walking gear. So what are you waiting for, come and join this challenge with me and let us share this journey together.


B x

Attending my first ever spiritual circle!

Last night I embarked on my first experience of a spiritual development circle. After been sceptical of what to expect I finally plucked up the courage after many years of deliberation to attend. The circle consisted of 4 of us, 5 if you include the leader. As the group only started last night everyone was new to each other and new to the experience of a spiritual circle.

The setting of the circle is an old peaceful cottage in my town centre. I am well aware of the cottage as I go there regularly for monthly sky energy massages. The cottage is the most beautiful place, with old beams and bricks on show. The whole building has such a magical feeling to it that it really puts me at ease in there.

With everyone settled in the tiny cottage reception area of cosy couches and chairs we all got to know each other a little bit;  we were then talked through of what the circle is all about and what we can expect to do within the circle. For me I yearn to gain more knowledge on Tarot and how to read cards. This is something in which other members of the circle wanted to gain knowledge and experience from also. Runes is also something in which I am drawn to, but feel at the moment I will be unable to gain the knowledge I want to on Runes from this circle.

Chakras and Auras were the focus for last night’s circle. After a brief meditation session to open our chakras we focused on feeling our own energy and learning how to control our energy. For me this is something in which I have always found relatively easy, I am super sensitive not only to my own energy but also the energy of others around me. Ever since I was a child I could feel presence around me, I was always the best at hide and seek when it came to seeking as I was drawn to peoples energy like birds to nectar. In a way this has been a negative for me over my life, because I am so drawn to other peoples energy I sometimes feed off it; their energy drains into me and this has brought me down at times as other peoples bad energy seeps into me. Last night I learnt how to shut my chakras off and close myself a little bit so I do not open myself up as much to other peoples Auras.

After attending the circle I was pleasantly surprised with how much I enjoyed it. Not only did it get me out the house and around like minded people for a couple of hours it also gave me focus on parts of my mind and body in which I had no clue about previously. I am excited now to develop and learn more spiritually; also to be able to pass on my knowledge  mentor and teach others in what I am learning from the circle. I am excited to start living more spiritually and applying it more within my everyday life.

B x

Joining a spiritual development circle.

Tonight I am starting my journey within a spiritual development circle. For a while now I have wanted to develop more on a spiritual level and learn more about paganism and spirituality so when I saw there was a new circle starting up in my local area I jumped at the chance to join.


At the moment I am feeling a bit dubious and nervous about what to expect from the circle. Especially with what it will entail and the other people that will be joining the group will be like. Never before have I don’t anything like this so have no idea what to expect. This year is going to be the year I definitely delve more into my Pagan and spiritual side, I am a bit annoyed with myself for not doing it sooner. I feel as though it is something that has been calling me towards it for such a long time and I have been a fool for taking so long to go towards it.


My future plans are to work and live more spiritually, my dream would be to have a career mentoring others and guiding them towards paganism and meditation. Also taking a more holistic approach and gaining experience and guidance into doing something career wise holistically.


Wish me luck for tonight. If anyone has any tips on what to expect from the circle and how I can develop myself further into a holistic career that would be awesome.


I will keep you all posted with how I get on.


B x

Meditation journey!

So my journey in life has taken me down the road of meditation.

Meditation is something in which I have always wanted to do but never had the headspace or knowledge to be able to do it; if that makes sense. My head can be pretty chaotic most of the time, with all different ranges of thoughts and processes going through my head at one given time, so to be able to sit down relax and deeply focus has always been a big struggle.

Over the past week I decided that I was going to join a local meditation and relaxation group that has started at my local healing centre. I was dubious at first of what to expect but came out with a sense of achievement and enlightenment into something in which I can see myself really getting into.  At first I couldn’t feel anything working. I tried breathing and focusing on what the mentor was saying but just didn’t feel anything happening at all. Around 10 minutes in everything changed. I could see this path clearly in my mind but I was shocked in what I saw and heard.

Instead of a nice scenic picture and thoughts there was someone crying out for help. Over and over in my head all I heard was help me! I couldn’t see this person and no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t find them either, just heard them over and over crying out for me. At first this deeply worried me but having come back to the real world it made me want to search more into my mind for whom this person could be.


Why do they need my help? Who could this person be? Are they in trouble? Or is it me? Is the person in my head crying out help me because in reality it is my conscious telling me that something is wrong. Is the voice my own self-doubt and my own yearning for something.


Meditation is something in which I definitely want to stick to. By going to a meditation group it made it a hell of a lot easier to focus and actually meditate rather than having the goal of meditating in your head but never actually getting round to doing it. Also having the guidance from the mentor leading the session is a big help. Having the support from the fellow group members and a sense of belonging is the most amazing feeling.


I would love to hear your meditation stories. Has anyone else had negative or distressing signs from meditation or know why I am hearing negativity within my meditation?


B x

My Vision Board 

After seeing various articles in magazines about vision boards and the positive impact in which they have on achieving goals I decided to get my own little cork board and get pinning. As you can see my board is packed full of images so I thought I would share with you guys what my board means to me and what I want to achieve in life.


1.     Run my own Campsite/Woodland retreat 

2.     Buy my own land/Live within nature 

3.     Build a hobbit style house

4.     Eat healthy/Grow my own

5.     Learn Yoga/Keep fitter

6.     Come first in an archery clout shoot 

7.     Develop more on my Pagan/Spiritual    path

8.     Be a Warrior/ Or maybe a woodland elf (dress up more)

9.     Join a Viking re-enactment group

10.   Have a woodland wedding

11.   Own a wolfdog

12.   Own a raven

13.   Learn Tantric sex

14.   Love me more

15.   Learn runes/tarot/crystals

16.   Have a baby

17.   Travel more


Life is one big journey in which we only get one chance at. Why shouldn’t we do the things we love and enjoy life whilst we can. I loved doing this vision board. It really got me thinking about life and what I want from it. I would definitely recommend vision boarding to everyone that is a little bit stuck in life and needs something to help them along with their motivation.


B x


Recently I have been thinking about my life and whether I am on the journey in which I want to be heading down; the answer is no, I am not on that journey at all, I am pretty much the furthest away I can be from it right now. To be honest I am not sure how to pursue the journey in which I want, I feel very lost in life at the moment and at times it is pretty daunting.

Growing up I was always one of these indecisive people. One minute I wanted to be a farmer the next minute I wanted to be a pyro technician and all other crazy things that seemed cool at the time. Because I had this unsettling nature I found it hard trying to actually figure out what I wanted to do in life; even though deep down I always knew what I wanted, if that makes sense. It was just actually having the balls to take the leap and doing it, that was the part in which I was never really good at.

Deep down I wanted freedom. That is something in life in which I have always yearned for. To be within nature and live a complete natural way of life. I have always felt suffocated in society and the concrete jungle surrounding me. Even though I grew up in a town I still felt enclosed in and unable to breath.

At the moment, I have a good job. Don’t get me wrong it pays well and I guess for some it is enjoyable; for me its torture, I feel stuck there like I have no escape, I have no option to leave right now. I find it so hard to get out of bed every morning to go and sit 8 hours nonstop behind a desk looking at a computer screen. The days drag and each day I go home tired and unmotivated to do the things I love; everything is drained from me, who knew you could get so tired from sitting all day. I feel right now though I have no choice but to be there. I need the money, who doesn’t but I need freedom from that place so bad before it drives me insane.

If I had the chance I would have my own land. Woodland with an open space so I could build home. Nothing to fancy, close to nature and cosy. Something I could call my own. Of course, it would be full to the rafters with books and all the things I love in life. I would love my own Pagan retreat; somewhere where likeminded people can come and camp out and experience life with me. Holistic healing location and a place to be close to nature, that would be my dream. But unfortunately, its buying that dream in which I feel I will never be able to accomplish. Working full time makes It hard to go and study in what I want to do, and having to pay out for courses would eat into my savings account in which I would need for the land; either way I feel I cannot win and this will forever stay my dream.

I hope one day I get the strength and the courage to take the leap and go for my dreams, I feel like this lifestyle in which I am living right now isn’t for me at all. I am stagnant and I am drowning, drowning in frustration and boredom of the 9-5 slog of everyday. I need to be the person I want to be, I need freedom!

Pagan path beginning….

I have decided to start a new journey in life; Paganism!

For many years I have had an interest in Paganism but never really gone anywhere with it or learnt in depth anything about it. This year I want to take my intrigue further and become Pagan. It feels like a calling in which I have been meaning to follow for a long time now.

My only problem is I do not really know where to start. A few weeks ago I decided to have a reading and he told me I was very gifted in a spiritual sense and to join a circle as soon as possible, he thinks I would quickly work my way up through the ranks of a circle and become very successful. However, how the hell do I do this. I do not even know what a circle entails and how I would be able to use Paganism to become successful in life.


I have always wanted to do something different career wise. The reader told me I was a healer in a previous life, so maybe this is my calling once again, who knows!

Hopefully a circle will be starting in my local area in a few weeks. This is something in which I will definitely be joining. Until then I would love to hear from other Pagan’s.  I would love to hear your stories and how you developed and grew within Paganism. Also if anyone has made a career from their Paganism or doing something a little bit different. Any tips or advice would be gratefully appreciated.

B x